Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Saving Francesca by Melina Marchetta

Saving Francesca
Melina Marchetta
Published 2004 by Knopf Books for Young Readers

Most of the time, I'll finish a book and then move on with my life. There's always something else to do, read, see. Books pass through and leave little trace beyond a vaguely fond memory. But sometimes I stumble across a book that is special. It makes me forget about bedtime and my early-morning alarm. I finish it and instead of moving on, I'm reminded of how to sit and just be.

I will assume that you've figured out by now that Saving Francesca is one of those books. It's not my usual fare. There are no wizards or dragons, and no one is trying to kill anyone else. And yet I devoured it in a single sitting. It had That Thing. That Thing is what makes books great. That Thing is ephemeral and ineffable and all those other words you say when you can't figure out how to say something magical. That Thing takes good books and makes them real and emotional and spectacular.

Maybe a little bit of That Thing is the characters. They're all real and relatable; they feel like people I know rather than people who live inside the pages of a book. Their issues, their sorrows, their joys, all felt immediate and personal. And Saving Francesca had a refreshingly normal portrayal of high school – one filled with people rather than stereotypes. It's probably the most accurate fictional high school I've seen, in a genre over-filled with life-sized cardboard "popular" crowds.

Maybe another piece of That Thing is the voice. Francesca sounds like she's just talking, something that can be annoying but isn't here. It makes her problems feel much more real and human. It made me laugh out loud and tear up a little when she cried.

Maybe a third part of That Thing is hope. Because as tough as life is for Francesca and her family, there's always hope in the end. It made me want to keep reading. It makes me want more of this story even after I've finished.

If you're in one of those moods where you're skipping to the end of the review to read my overall impressions, I can sum them up for you in three words. Read. This. Book.

Quality: Outstanding
Enjoyability: Outstanding

Saving Francesca is similar to:
If I Stay by Gayle Forman

Top Ten Books I Think Would Make Great Book Club Picks

This topic required a lot of thought, because while there are plenty of books I love, they wouldn't necessarily make for great discussion. To be a good book club pick, a book has to not only have a good story but also contain some deeper message that's worth discussing. I think it generally helps, too, when the book is a stand-alone or at least has a self-contained story. It can be complicated to discuss an entire series, especially if you're expecting a lot of people to read it within a certain period of time. So with that in mind, here are ten books that I love and that I think would be great book club picks.

These are alphabetical by author, because I suck at ranking things.

Orson Scott Card

Probably most of you have read this already, but if you haven't, check it out. Besides being a great story, it raises some interesting questions about childhood and just how much leeway necessity gives you for dire action.

Gayle Forman

Any book that combines tragedy and hope the way this one does is worth reading. It would make a great book club pick for its portrayal of choices and life.

Frank Herbert

Dune is one of the most famous science fiction novels ever written, and for good reason. There are so many things that could be discussed in this book that you could probably have a whole year of book club meetings about it.

Guy Gavriel Kay

Really any book by GGK would make a great book club read, but The Lions of Al-Rassan is my favorite so I'm sticking with this one. It's about people's differences and similarities, and how war affects friendship and love. It's a really amazing story that takes place in a world based on Spain just before the Reconquista. It may be my favorite book ever, and it would make for great discussion.

Robert Kroese

Mercury Falls is an amazing, hilarious book about the Apocalypse (which is also appropriate because, as everyone know, the world is ending December Something-th). It's a brilliant story that also makes some interesting points about free will and religion without being preachy at all.

Madeline L'Engle

I read this book so many times as a kid that it literally fell apart (though in my defense it wasn't in that great a condition when I got it). Still, A Wrinkle in Time is a favorite of mine even now. It presents such ideas as right and wrong, and free will along with some fascinating science-y stuff.

Robin McKinley

I know this is a good book for discussion because I wrote a paper on it in college (which was a total win. I loved that paper). Fairy tale retellings are always interesting because of the comparisons you can make between the original and new versions, and I think Spindle's End is particularly interesting in that regard.

Erin Morgenstern

The Night Circus is an amazing and beautifully descriptive story. Personally, I'd love to discuss in more depth the different approaches to magic Alexander and Prospero embrace, and there are plenty of other topics among the tents.

Brandon Sanderson

Elantris is another great story that examines interesting things like political expedience and how to choose when all your choices seem bad. The world itself could also be interesting to talk about.

Daisy Whitney

Whether you love or hate this YA novel, there's no question that it has any number of issues worth discussing. Justice, fairness, perception, and truth all play a role in this story, and it would definitely make for some very interesting if difficult debate.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians by Brandon Sanderson

Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians
Brandon Sanderson
Alcatraz #1
Published October 1, 2007 by Scholastic

Bite-sized Review
Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians was a fun, unique read. The unusual nature of the world Sanderson created made up for the excessive silliness of the narration.

King-sized Review
As the Alcatraz series was the only one of Brandon Sanderson's I hadn't tried (I haven't read The Alloy of Law yet, but I've read the rest of the Mistborn books), I almost had to give it a try. Since it's a middle grade story rather than one of Sanderson's usual epic fantasy sagas, I expected it to be different, and it certainly was. It's definitely clear that this was written for a younger audience; it's very silly – sometimes a little too silly – and rather simpler than Sanderson's other works. However, it was a fun and entertaining read.

As we've come to expect from Brandon Sanderson, the world of the Free Kingdoms and the Hushlands was very different and interesting. People have magical talents like breaking things, being late, saying things that don't make sense, and tripping and falling. Alcatraz is a funny, irreverent hero who's convinced he's not a hero at all. The story does use some slightly tired tropes – Alcatraz is raised by foster parents, and has no idea who he really is, for example, but the uniqueness of the world more than compensated for that.

One unusual point was that the narrator, Alcatraz, often takes a moment (usually in the middle of a sticky situation) to address the reader directly. This device was usually funny, though it did become a bit tiresome after a while.

I listened to this book, and I found the narration decent, if nothing particularly spectacular. I liked the different voices, but there were a couple times I thought the narrator forgot to switch to the right character for a bit of their dialogue, which was a little confusing.

I would recommend this book to anyone looking for something silly and different. I enjoyed it, and I will be reading the rest of the series.

Quality: Good
Enjoyability: Acceptable

Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians is similar to:
The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan
Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones
Pawn of Prophecy by David Eddings

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Sunday Series Spotlight #4: Kate Daniels

I love this blog and sharing my opinions on books with people. I've really enjoyed getting recommendations from others, and I hope a few people have found good books on here too. But as much as I love the books I've been reading, there are many books I read before starting the blog that I want to share too! That's why I decided to start the Sunday Series Spotlight and tell everyone about my old favorites.

You're welcome to share your own favorite series...es... –just grab the button and leave a link in the comments.

This week's spotlight is on Kate Daniels by Ilona Andrews

Atlanta would be a nice place to live, if it weren't for magic...

One moment magic dominates, and cars stall and guns fail. The next, technology dominates, and the defensive spells no longer protect your house from monsters. Here skyscrapers topple under onslaught of magic; werebears and werehyenas prowl through the ruined streets; the Masters of the Dead, driven by their thirst for power and wealth, pilot blood-crazed vampires with their minds. In this world lives Kate Daniels. Kate likes her sword a little too much and has a hard time controlling her mouth. The magic in her blood makes her a target, and she spent most of her life hiding in plain sight. But when Kate's guardian is murdered, she must choose to do nothing and remain safe or to pursue her preternatural killer. Hiding is easy, but the right choice is rarely easy...

Kate Daniels is another one of those series that you hear me rave about at least once a week. I adore Kate. She's awesome and powerful and badass, but she has weaknesses and gets hurt and has to make difficult choices. And Curran...I think I'm in love with Curran. Kate and Curran are my favorite fictional couple. They crack me up and make me go "awwww." The stories are always exciting, dangerous, and surprising. I could keep going on for pages and pages about how much I freaking love this series, but I'll stop now. Please, please just read it! It's spectacular. Seriously, just thinking about it is making me happy.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

In My Mailbox #3

In My Mailbox is hosted by Kristi at The Story Siren, and it's an opportunity to show off all the books we've gotten!

I do my IMMs every other Saturday. Here are the books I've gotten the past two weeks. I've put myself on a book buying ban for the foreseeable future, so these were all free in one way or another! I may have gotten a little carried away at the library...

Free download from Amazon
The Emerald Talisman by Brenda Pandos
Zombies Don't Cry by Rusty Fischer

From the library
Blood and Chocolate by Annette Curtis Klause
The Magicians of Caprona by Diana Wynne Jones

Saving Francesca by Melina Marchetta
Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen
Bloodrose by Andrea Cremer
Across the Universe by Beth Revis
Cinder by Marissa Meyer
An Abundance of Katherines by John Green

Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes
Beauty by Robin McKinley
The Mockingbirds by Daisy Whitney
Vanish by Sophie Jordan
White Cat by Holly Black
The Alloy of Law by Brandon Sanderson
Dragonhaven by Robin McKinley

From NetGalley
Royal Street by Suzanne Johnson
Starters by Lissa Price

Won from FictionFervor
Tower of Parlen Min by Matt Xell

What's in your mailbox?

Friday, January 27, 2012

Blood Warrior by H.D. Gordon

Blood Warrior
H.D. Gordon
The Alexa Montgomery Saga #1
Published September 5, 2011 by H.D. Gordon

Bite-sized Review
I really wanted to like this book, but I couldn't get into it. A combination of antipathy toward the characters, inconsistencies, and the lack of a discernable plot made it difficult for me to finish this book. However, a lot of people really enjoyed it, so just keep that in mind when you're reading what I have to say.

King-sized Review
I picked up Blood Warrior from the R2R program on one of my Goodreads groups. I had already heard a lot of people rave about how amazing it was, so I was excited to read it. It sounded like a great story: mystery, danger, inner conflict, magic – all the things I love.

Unfortunately, I didn't find it nearly as thrilling as most of my friends. Every time I picked it up, I read a few pages and then found myself doing something else. I'd switch to another book on my Kindle, go online, watch TV. I just couldn't focus on this book. Obviously I did finish it, or I wouldn't be writing this review, but it took me a week and a half, which for me is the approximate equivalent of forever.

There were a couple of reasons for my disinterest that I immediately recognized. First, the love triangle. This may have just been bad timing. At this point I am incredibly sick of love triangles. They are now a hurdle that a book has to overcome to get a good rating from me. That's something that happens occasionally, but in this case not only was there a love triangle, but I didn't find either of the love interests...interesting. In the scenes when Alexa was with Kayden or Jackson, I felt nothing at all. I don't even care who she ends up with.

Which leads me to my next problem. Alexa went through a lot of strong emotions in this book, and I should have felt something for her. The only thing I really felt was exasperation. I wasn't emotionally invested in any of the characters, and the closest I got to caring was wondering why everyone was so tolerant of Alexa's homicidal tendencies, because it just didn't seem reasonable that everyone would think it was perfectly normal for her to snap and try to kill people whenever they annoyed her. This is where "show, don't tell" really comes in; actions can sometimes be told, but emotions must be shown, or I don't believe them.

Inconsistencies and incredibilities cropped up with unfortunate frequency in this story. Why did Alexa's mom prepare her physically for her heritage, but not mentally? Wouldn't the training Alexa hated so much have been more palatable if she actually knew what it was for? And how can an obviously rather small society sustain the weekly death or severe injury of its elite? Either I don't understand how the competition in the Arena works, or there are way more warriors than it looks like. Why did Nelly, the younger sister, always seem to be older than Alexa? Individually, none of these are all that important (except for the first one, which really bothered me), but once they start stacking up, it becomes a problem.

Finally, the plot lacked direction. Mostly it was just Alexa barreling from one overdramatized crisis to another. There were a couple of good plot points, but they didn't really go anywhere. I really felt like this book was just painting the background for an actual story. I don't think I can stress how important this is. Stories need a point. The entire plot of this book was literally just Alexa learning various disturbing things about her new home, and then seeing something else weird but unrelated, and then doing something impulsive, and also unrelated. The ending had no resolution because there was nothing to resolve, although it did suggest to me that the plot in the next book will be rather better.

Okay. Having said all that, a number of friends have really liked this book, so it's entirely possible you will as well. I did find the world fairly interesting, with good twists on traditional legend. Alexa is a strong heroine who obviously cares about people, even though some aspects of her personality are rather off-putting. So if the basic idea here sounds like something you would enjoy, you should probably just ignore me and give it a try. Let me know how it goes.

Quality: Fair
Enjoyability: Poor

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Stars of...Shapeshifters

The "Stars of..." series is a new feature I'm doing here at Epic (Chocolate) Fantasy to highlight the best books in different areas of the fantasy genre. Say you want a book about shapeshifters or wizards or mythology, or maybe you want to read some political or heroic fantasy. Stop by here every Thursday for the foreseeable future, and I'll have recommendations for you! Click on the book covers for links to the first book in the series and on the series name for a list of the books in it on Goodreads.

If you think there's something I missed in this category, feel free to leave your own suggestions in the comments! I haven't read everything out there, obviously, and I'd love some recommendations myself.

Series are alphabetical by author.

Stars of...Shapeshifters
*click the book cover for a link to the first book and the series title for a link to the series list*


Kelley Armstrong
Women of the Otherworld
12 books, ongoing (3 werewolf books)

The Women of the Otherworld series, which focuses on women of various supernatural species, has several books featuring a werewolf, Elena Michaels. Elena's books are my favorite in a series I really enjoy. Her determination, humor, and spirit make her books fun and exciting. Also, Elena and Clay are lots of fun.

Keri Arthur
Riley Jenson, Guardian
9 books, completed

Riley and her twin, Rhoan, are half-vampire, half-werewolf, and working for the Directorate of Other Races keeps both halves plenty busy. I was hesitant to pick up this series at first, because it sounded like a constant sex-fest, but it's actually much more; Riley gets involved in some very dangerous and exciting situations, and I've really enjoyed what I've read of this series so far.

J.A. Belfield
Holloway Pack
1 book, ongoing

Even though there were aspects of this story that I didn't really like, it had that ineffable quality that makes you keep reading. It's definitely worth a read, and I want to find out more about this world of werewolves and magic.

Patricia Briggs
Mercy Thompson
6 books, ongoing

Mercy is a walker raised by werewolves. Her adventures, involving fae, vampires, the werewolf pack, and other supernaturals, are exciting and fun. Mercy is a great character with credible strengths and weaknesses, and she's grown a lot throughout the series. These books have some great lines and really touching moments, not to mention plenty of ass-kicking!

Alpha and Omega
2 books, ongoing

A bit more toward the romance end of the spectrum, Alpha and Omega features Omega werewolf Anna and her mate, Charles Cornick. Although Alpha and Omega takes place in the same world as Mercy Thompson and with many of the same characters, there's not a whole lot of crossover. Anna is actually one of my favorite characters; she's easy to underestimate but really quite strong. And Charles is surprisingly sensitive for a dominant werewolf.

Carrie Vaughn
Kitty Norville
9 books, ongoing

Yup, a werewolf named Kitty. And this werewolf just happens to be a radio host...for the supernatural. Kitty Norville is fun and interesting, and Kitty is always stumbling into some sort of misadventure. She grows a lot during this series, and her reactions are always fun to see.

Rachel Vincent
6 books, completed

I've only read the first book in this series, but it was pretty good. True, Faythe can be pretty annoying, but she does care, which makes her a bit more likable. Plus there is plenty of action here.


Kelley Armstrong
Darkness Rising
1 book, ongoing

I absolutely loved Maya, the main character in The Gathering. She's witty but friendly, and seeing the mystery of her town and her new neighbors unfold was fascinating. I can't wait for the next book in this spin-off of the Women of the Otherworld series.

Amelia Atwater-Rhodes
The Kiesha'ra
5 books

In this highly unique take on shapeshifters, the avians and the serpiente have been enemies for longer than anyone can remember. Danica Shardae, heir to the avian throne, is tired of watching her family and friends die. So when her enemy and counterpart Zane Cobriana proposes a solution to the conflict, she's willing to try anything, no matter what difficulties come her way. I love the setting of this story, and the characters as well. Now I really want to read it again.

Andrea Cremer
3 books, completed

I couldn't put Nightshade, the first book in this trilogy, down, and I bought the second book right after I finished it. Worlds of lies are lots of fun (to read about). I just got Bloodrose from the library, and I can't wait to see how this story ends.

Maggie Stiefvater
The Wolves of Mercy Falls
3 books, completed

If you've been around here for any length of time, you know that I love Maggie Stiefvater. When I finished The Wolves of Mercy Falls, I couldn't even form coherent thoughts, but only rave about how amazing these books were. With unique characters, spectacular writing, and refreshingly, no love triangle, The Wolves of Mercy Falls is my favorite werewolf series out there.

Other books that include shapeshifters, just not as the main characters
The Edge by Ilona Andrews
Kate Daniels by Ilona Andrews
Dresden Files by Jim Butcher
Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter by Laurell K. Hamilton
The Hollows by Kim Harrison

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Mercury Rises by Robert Kroese

Mercury Rises
Robert Kroese
Mercury #2
Published October 18, 2011 by AmazonEncore

Bite-sized Review
While not quite as fun as Mercury Falls, Mercury Rises still provided an interesting story with a sense of humor.

King-sized Review
I was really excited when I learned there was going to be a sequel to Mercury Falls, an incredibly hilarious and brilliant book about the Apocalypse. (Seriously, go check it out. It is completely worth it.) I mean, sure, the plot had seemed pretty nicely wrapped up at the end of the first book, but for more of Mercury and Christine and general ridiculousness, I was more than willing for this series to continue.

The problem was, there wasn't really much Mercury and Christine or general ridiculousness. I'm not saying it was a bad book, but it wasn't nearly as fun and light-hearted as the first one. What I loved best about Mercury Falls was its ability to point out the silliness of certain religious and philosophical standards without seeming angry or preachy. In Mercury Rises, there's less of that whimsy, and it feels more like the book is trying to make a point. Also the footnotes are much less fun.

This book is also about the Apocalypse. But since we already did the Revelations version in Mercury Falls, this one had to be different, with the result that the story, particularly the Ancient Babylon scenes, didn't really seem to have a point until the end (although I still wasn't entirely certain the Ancient Babylon scenes were necessary). And it is lucky I find theoretical physics interesting, because there is quite a bit of it in this book. The examples and analogies were actually pretty good, but if hearing about quarks and relativity makes your eyes glaze over, this may not be your thing. It's certainly not the entire book – you could easily skim over those parts without really missing much – but fair warning, there is plenty of it.

Even though Mercury Rises had a lot of Mercury and a lot of Christine, there wasn't very much Mercury-and-Christine, which as it turns out may have been key to the last book. When they finally did meet again, I think the book improved. Still not to the level of the previous one, but I did enjoy it more.

So. First, Mercury Falls is awesome and you should read it. Second, even though this book wasn't as good, it wasn't bad either. It had an interesting plot and was still pretty funny. It just sounds bad because I'm comparing it to the first one. And third, I will most definitely read book three when it comes out.

Quality: Acceptable
Enjoyability: Acceptable

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Teaser Tuesday and Top Ten Places NOT to Read a Book

Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme, hosted by MizB of Should Be ReadingAnyone can play along! Just do the following:

-Grab your current read
-Open to a random page
-Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
-BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (Make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)
-Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers!

I'm currently re-reading Magic Bleeds, book four of the awesome Kate Daniels series by Ilona Andrews.

I could do this. I just had to stay cool. Zen. No punching in the face. Punching would not be Zen.


Top Ten Tuesday is hosted weekly by the lovely ladies at The Broke and The Bookish.

This week's "freebie" was actually more difficult than just making up things for a given category! But after straining my brain to its limits (and with a little help from some friends), I came up with...

The Top Ten Places NOT to Read a Book
For the record, I have only actually done 4.5 of these.
10. In Class

97% of my grade school experience

Boring classes are pretty much a fact of life, unless you go to some strange alternate-universe school that actually teaches you interesting things in interesting ways. I'm pretty sure those don't exist though. Anyway, if you're stuck in a boring class, you might think to yourself, "Hey, I know. I'll read a book under the desk! That will be way more interesting than learning the decimal system!"


This will only result in you learning nothing about decimals and, since you know nothing about decimals, failing your decimal test, which will severely traumatize your fifth-grade self. Hypothetically. Because obviously I would never do such a thing.

0.001% of my grade school experience. Still traumatized.

9. In the Bathtub

So, after a long, stressful day learning about decimals (because you have figured out that you should not read in class), you need something soothing. And what's more soothing than a hot bath with a good book?


You will inevitably drop your book in the water, which as it turns out does not end well for your book. The pen may be mightier than the sword, but apparently water beats pen hands-down.


8. While Driving

Just another day in paradise.

Who doesn't hate traffic jams? Who doesn't wish there were something to occupy their time in such situations besides screaming obscenities at your friendly neighboring drivers? Why not break out a book for those times? It's not like you're actually going anywhere, right?


You would think this would be obvious (although one time I did study for a calculus test at red lights. That probably wasn't good either), but I have actually seen people sitting in traffic with a book balanced on the steering wheel. Guys, THIS WILL RESULT IN BAD THINGS.

7. In a Meeting

Meetings are boring. And also pointless. And also boring and pointless. If only you could do something interesting in them surreptitiously...like read a book! Books are fun and not boring! Plus they can often be disguised as cell phones or computers, so that it looks like you're doing real work, like skimming 9GAG.


When you start laughing at a funny line, your boss will notice that you are not listening to the meeting (because meetings are not funny). Then you will get fired and be forever alone.

6. At a Family Gathering

Except James Earl Jones would never sound that awkward.

You know your family? Not the ones you live with, the ones you see like once every three years and they seem to have multiplied every time? At some point, you will have to go visit them. All of them. At the same time. And since you don't like inane chit chat and everyone except you and Brother is either over 40 or under 10, you pull out your phone so you can read a book.


People will give you disappointed looks and you will bring shame upon your family. Then you will have to redeem yourself by talking about what you want to do with your life for the whole rest of the party, until you run out of ways to make "I don't have a @#!*ing clue" sound positive. Then you will have to listen to baby stories.

5. Sitting by a Fire
*Thanks to Jen for this idea!

Let's say you're camping, and it's bonfire time. You grab a pointy stick, some marshmallows, and a book, and pull your chair up close to the fire to stay warm.


While you are nibbling on your perfectly toasted marshmallow, a giant spider may appear suddenly on your hand. As you run around screaming like a little girl, "Get it off get it off get it off!!" everything that you were previously holding (i.e. marshmallow, stick, and book) will be accidentally consigned to the flames.

Guys, never Google image search for spiders. If you hear whimpering at any point after this, don't worry, it's just me suffering from giant spider PTSD.

4. While Straightening Your Hair

Straightening your hair is tedious and repetitive. Difficulty level easily below a 2. You could do it in the dark, with your eyes closed. So since it's so boring, why not prop a book against the mirror and read while you primp?


Recognize this thing?

It's either a hair straightener or a medieval torture device.
See those metal plates? In order to make your hair stay straight, those plates heat up to very high temperatures. Temperatures like that make big owies when you stop paying attention. And then once you stop screaming, you won't remember where you were in the book anyway.

3. While Cooking Dinner

Although if my cooking produced green flames, I would not find it necessary to read. Or eat.

"Aha!" you think. "I will just read a few pages while waiting to flip my pancakes! No harm could possibly come from that!"


There's no such thing as "just reading a few pages." Thirty pages later, you will realize that all you have to eat now is this:

Ew. Again, not eating.

2. In a Duel to the Death
*Thanks to Sonnie for this idea!

One sunny day, you are strolling along idly, when suddenly you hear someone mocking Harry Potter! There is clearly only one solution. You must challenge this person to a duel. To the death. And they will accept, because they are obviously crazy. On the appointed day, you meet in a clearing. After saluting each other, you both turn around and march ten paces away. Then, you turn back to face your opponent, and...
open your book. Wait, what?


You are in a duel to the death, Hypothetical Object of This Speech! By definition, the loser of a duel to the death dies. Don't die.

Thanks, Boromir. You always did give the best advice.

1. While the Plane is Taking Off/Landing


Because after being told to shut off my Kindle 11,000 times, this is what I assume will happen if I leave it on:

If this is not what will happen, then LET ME READ MY FREAKING KINDLE.

So what did you pick for today's list? (And how many of these have you done?) Leave a link after your comment!